Noah (2014)

Uh… No. Sorry Aronofsky. You had me swept  away in a deluge of wonder with Black Swan and Requiem for a Dream. This film, was a light drizzle of inspiration. I’m not going to go into a Biblical tirade, but I’ll just say this: if you are making a film based off of a written account (The Bible), at least attempt to make it follow the actual story. If a director did this with Harry Potter or the Hunger games, and changed so much of the story (Maybe Harry as a Slytherin or Katniss in District 1) people would have blown their tops. Also, the movie was all over the place. At one point I couldn’t tell if someone had dubbed over my movie with the Lord of the Rings. The sequence of Genesis was wonderful, I’ll admit. I love Emma Watson, but her character was unbearable in this film. I kept hoping she’d fall off the ark. If you have any basic knowledge of the actual story you’ll be shaking your head. Stone Golems building the ark? Yikes. It’s fine, but a choir of Angels won’t be singing any hymns about this film.


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Noah (2014)


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